Tuesday, February 19, 2013

Mama is CLOSED

Have you ever uttered the words "Mama is CLOSED"?

I did today.

John has a work injury and has been leaving earlier than usual to have physical therapy.  Construction has started in 'our field' and it is no longer our field, so the kids have lost their main outdoor play space.  And a broken molar has been bugging me to no end for days.

So after a good, but long day with them doing seemingly endless housework, schoolwork and making up dances and perfecting my Jabba The Hut face that collapses them into giggles, I was done.  And when they started bickering over something silly, I was done.  I was even more done when "Mama?  Mama?  Mama?  MOOOOOM?" was being hollered at me every 30 seconds.

So I told the kids I was closed.  I think they were shocked.  I know they were shocked.  Moms don't close.  Moms are available 24/7. Moms don't pee by themselves without interruption.  Moms reheat their coffee four times each morning before getting a sip.  This is their experience.

But it was good for me and it will be good for them.  It needs to be done sometimes.  Otherwise I will find myself bent over, hauling clothes out of the dryer  thinking "I'm going on strike!" or "I am moving to a hotel alone for a week!" or the mature route:  "I'm running away from home!" and then I realize that I'll do none of these things and  that I have overextended myself.  I remember that I am not just a mama but a wife and friend and woman and PERSON and I will take care of my stuff and then decide that I am 'closed' for the next five minutes, half hour, rest of the evening, whatever it will take to get recharged.

And then I will be open and hugs and smiles will be all the readier.  I will be a better Mom because I took time to just be.

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