Tuesday, February 11, 2014
Be Gentle With Yourself
Something that several people who love me have told me recently is 'be gentle with yourself'. It is starting to really sink in. I have a tendency to be too hard on myself; and also let others be too hard on me. I told my husband recently that I feel like I have spent my whole life being a punching bag- for others but also for myself. I expect so much out of myself and will agonize over the smallest thing, and worry about what others think.
I am learning to be gentle with myself. In a way that seems backward to the whole concept, this also means finding my voice with others who are not being gentle with me.
I am letting myself be human. No less like Jesus, who I want to be like, but a human like He created me. I am not Super Woman. I'm me.
I am going to treat myself like He would treat me. Like I want others to treat me.
Being gentle with yourself doesn't have to be some huge action. The time will come when you have the opportunities to do something major for yourself. To take down the barriers and let someone in and love you lavishly. To have a moment where you get huge revelation of who you are.
This week there was small decision made to help me be gentle with myself. I had a coupon for those laundry detergent pods. If I bought them and used my coupon, I could get one of the ingredients I need for my homemade detergent free. I've been sick and tired and I am still reeling from the time caring for my son. I stood at the end cap in the store for ten minutes. No exaggeration. I was beating myself up for even considering the purchase. But I have been SO tired and overwhelmed and my homemade soap is running low and this luxury was really wanted. So I bought them and have really been enjoying them.
I probably won't buy them again, unless another tough period comes up. But for this week, I was able to be gentle with myself. I made the purchase, reveled in them, and did not beat myself up about it once I made the decision.
This may all sound selfish. But it isn't. After all, the Bible tells us to love others as we love ourselves- but if we don't love ourselves- the workmanship of God- how can we love others?